It’s easy to forget humility and act like violent men when facing certain types of people.
1. Those who have hurt me deeply
James has this first group in mind when he quotes Proverbs 3:34 to instruct the community to stop quarreling (Jas. 4:1-12). James argues that we each tend to love ourselves more than anyone else, so we fight for our rights. In the course of such conflict, we get hurt and want to retaliate. Instead, we must remember that our desires cannot give us what they promise. So we must turn to the Lord, because he always gives more grace than the world does. As we fear the Lord instead of focusing on ourselves, we become more humble people. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble” (Jas. 4:6).
2. Those who don’t deserve my trust
Peter has this second group in mind when he quotes Proverbs 3:34 to instruct the church to submit to the elders (1 Pet. 5:1-11). Elders are shepherds of the flock of God, but they must never be mistaken for the Chief Shepherd. When we put our leaders in the place of Jesus, they fail to deliver because they are neither divine nor sinless. When they fail, we tend to become disillusioned, anxious for the future of the church, and proud in our own opinions. Instead, we ought to fear the Lord more than we fear failure. This makes us both humble and effective, for “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble” (1 Pet. 5:5).
3. All the rest
Paul has all of us in mind when he draws us back to Christ’s humility to empower our own (Phil. 2:1-18). Does Christ encourage you? Does his love comfort you? Do you participate in his Spirit? Has God shown any affection or sympathy toward you? Jesus gave up what he deserved (his rights as God) and took on what he did not deserve (the role of a servant, the limitations of a human body, and the utter disgrace of death by crucifixion). He did it to rescue you from what you deserve (God’s judgment) and to give you what you do not deserve (God’s pleasure). Paul was so affected by Jesus’ humility that he was prepared to die himself if it meant his people would hold these truths more dearly.
Loving others wisely and humbly is not optional for followers of Christ. It’s the meat and potatoes of living by faith in community with other sinners. Wisdom must penetrate this crucial area of our lives. The fear of the Lord is the beginning, and when you fear the Lord you can’t help but become like him. That means dying for others, even if they’ve hurt you or if they don’t deserve it. When Jesus’ humility grips you, it changes everything about you. Don’t turn inward and deny yourself the opportunity to fear the Lord and know Jesus in his humility. As Raymond Ortlund writes:
If you would like to experience God with that humility, here is how you can. You look at the cross. You see a wise man hanging there, dying in the place of fools like you, because he loves you. You may despise him, but he does not despise you. You may be above him, but he humbled himself for you. Look there at him. Look away from yourself. Look at him, and keep looking until your pride melts. You will not only worship, you will begin to grow wise.[1]
[1] Proverbs: Wisdom that Works, Kindle location 537-540.
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